There are some not-so-well produced videos that show exactly what I'm talking about on Expert Village.
Rainy days of ilampirai has some fuzzy but inspirational step by step instructions for different patterns.
Most importantly, Embroideryaddict, not only has some amazing projects on her blog, she also adds a few more names to the aari needle / zari needle confusion - it's also known as a tambour hook or in French 'Point de Beauvais'.